will my heart beat again?

XYZ has this relationship problem. She isn't sure about her feelings for this guy and wanted me to describe the feeling of loving someone. Recalling the feelings brought back fond memories.

Seven years ago, I met HIM; my first and may be my last serious love. My heart did beat for him. Whenever he was around, my heart beat vibrantly and blushes coloured my cheeks. My lungs were malfunctioning. I remembered the time when he was sitting right in front of me. I was so nervous. I could hear my heart pumping like mad (I wondered did he hear it) and my cheeks were burning red. Choon Mei (sat next to me) asked if I was feeling very hot, why was my face so red. He and His friend overheard it and both of them turned about. Haha. I wanted to drill a hole in the ground to hide.

Those days locked the warmest memories of my life. We did the craziest things for love. Mei and I always threw our pencil cases down to the ground floor so that we could walk past their classes to catch a glance of them. In the end, we had to buy pens, pencils even staplers regularly (our old ones were damaged from the falls). I would sit in the bus stop and wait for him to appear so that we could take the same bus. Everyday, I stood in front of my kitchen window to watch him walk his dog.

Although our actual relationship lasted for three months and I didn’t know why he suddenly disappeared, I am glad that I once loved him (even though there was a period where I hated him). He gave the 2 whole years of my secondary life colours and joys. Every moment, I longed to see him, be it just a glance. Every minute, he would creep into my mind and light up my day. Every place I was, his shadow followed by soul.

Recently, I read a comic about Romeo and Juliet. It redefines my perspectives on true love. True love no longer meant to me as simply holding each other’s hands and walking towards the horizon. True love suppresses the fear of death. Because living without him or her, it is no difference from death. The heart stops beating for a purpose.

I wonder will my heart ever beat again like how it used to beat for HIM...